mrs doubtfire

Nothing can dispel the enthusiasm of school like mathematics. Don't get me wrong I have loved mathematics. but i speak for the majority. if you had a father like mine then you would have had a fair share of nightmares with einstein, carl francis and the other cahoots starring in them. he practically assured me impending sleepless nights if 'simple' maths could not add up. Even my mother's intervention was futile. He said everything around us applied mathematics to it. Mathematics was the catapault. Boy was he right. To approach a girl you have to calculate the odds before you go for the prize..save for those who sip burgundi wine at a corner table, six foot heels,a skirt which rivals my granmother's handkerchief and have their eyes laden with mascara(that's what its called? Right) those whose smile seems to say "I carry the heavy weight of beauty on my shoulder,excuse me if I seem pre occupied." Those ones need no calculation. Run away!! Its the only anaestethia to your ego. Our problems were qualmed once the report card had friendly numbers. and I never looked back, unless when scratching my back. Incase your wondering what a friendly number looks like, maybe I could tell what it doesn't look like. While my uncle was a kid he took his report card to my grandpa. The old man was educated. He took a good look. He then took another good look, probably assuming he had made some mistake at what he saw at first. With bewilderment he asked, " Is this the fees balance or your position?" what he saw was a not a friendly number.

My mathematics classes at the university are nothing short of tedious. Thing is I am tought in polish, so I'm experiencing a whole system overhaul. Everything I knew almost equates to nothing. Almost. But non the less I find the journey very interesting. There is no worse feeling than giving up. There sure are some dull days of mathematics. But nothing can take away the excitment created by mrs doubtfire. I call my maths lecturer mrs doubfire. Ok repeat that name, turn it over in your mind,make it simmer..aint it faboulous? She has the looks of mrs doubtfire(acted by robin williams) from the exclaimed movie..err. Only that she is no man. I think. Wom$n got jokes. And nothing beats a joke delivered by a stern face. Sometimes she cracks a smile to her jokes. Name whoever you think who has a personality of a cold sandwich, Mrs doubtfire will deliver his soul,with a smile attached to it.
Eddie griffin must have dropped out of her class.

if I could do a postmortem on her life I would give her 65+ years of accuring jokes. I strongly believe she must have been there around the second world war. Since that war started in poland, the good lord saved her from the bombs of hitler. And she sure returned the favour by teaching the good lord's creations maths,and a sense of humour. She witnessed the high handedness of the russians up till 21 years ago. Why I say this, is because the russians in my class get owned real good..and I mean real real good. One son and maybe a daughter just to give her the benefit of doubt. She speaks only french and polish. She appears to be knee deep in the cheese. And her dressing is elegant. If she would drop the thick glasses and quit blinking you'd think she is a mannequin. I think she spends a lot of time on the mirror. Well I don't blame her. Beauty is her portion. Unlike some of us who avoid mirrors because what stares back is not optically digestible.

We average at around sixteen students. Give or take one. The two Vietnamese and two Chinese are nothing short of brilliant. That I give them. So for sure no tantrums are thrown their way.

Murphy's law says anything that can happen will happen.

"Bildad my dear could you solve this sum for us."(Please note that there is no question mark).

At that moment, the angels in heaven must have stopped singing. The sum shaked the foundation on which I had built my deceptive mortality on. That was the hardest sum I have laid my eyes onto. That chalk must have broken into pieces immediately. I didn't have a snowball's chance in hell. I could hear the guy next to me swallow deep...and hard. I felt that small tail, which every human has, coil into a tight curl. Boy did I wish I could take a dump.

Footnote: This happens atleast twice every week. So next time you think you've had a hard week, think again.